Discouraged

Hey, guys...I'm not in a happy mood right now. In order to understand my pain you must realize something about me. I love music. I do. It's pretty much my entire life. I'm pretty sure i'd be living under a rock without it. Because of this passion for music I take voice lessons, which i love. The only problem is that my teacher makes me act as well as sing. In order to fully express yourself in your song you are sometimes required to act the part. That's just how it is, but honestly, if i'd wanted to act i would take drama, and there's a reason i don't do that. No matter how hard I try i can't seem to put myself out there. And now I've been told that something i love and something i hate must coexist completely discourages me! I don't know what I'm going to do. For like two seconds I considered quitting, but that just made my heart ache and my eyes burn, so that is completely out of the question.

I'm not sure how i'm going to sing if i have to act. It's not possible for me, it just isn't. It's not who i am (it may be someone i want to be, but i'm not going to be untrue to myself). Now, i realize that i'm being way too dramatic about this, but when it comes to me and music, there is no possible way to be melodramatic. I LOVE MUSIC! I love singing and listening to it. I love it when i become emotionally involved in what i'm listening to and the song is no longer just a song, but a story. I truly believe everything i've just said. What i don't believe is how acting and singing have anything to do with one another. Sure, they make a great combination when done right, I know plenty of musicals that have emotionally impacted me, but i will never be able to up myself to that level. My stupid anti-social personality keeps me from doing that. When i'm with a group of my friends, and they're acting crazy, I'm usually the only one not acting crazy. I laugh, sure, but i don't act. See where i'm getting at?

But whatever, I hope you've enjoyed my little spiel. I can't help but feel strongly about the point above. Secretly, I really really really really want to act while i sing, but i don't think i ever can. So for now, I won't. But anyway, that's all i can think to write right now. Thanks for listening. Hope i didn't annoy you.